Random Oscar thoughts as the night progressed…

Posted in Uncategorized by johnwildman on February 23, 2009

THE RED CARPET….

Funny couples moment that wasn’t even a Hollywood couples moment with Sarah Jessica Parker and Matthew Broderick when it became obvious during their response to the E! interviewer that she picked out his clothes for the night.

E!’s Giuliana squeals like an idiot upon seeing Brangelina. Really? (pause) Really?

I’m thinking that possibly the toughest thing about Loki’s passing (Mickey Rourke’s dog) is it throws into doubt who will accept the Oscar for Heath Ledger.

I feel for all the guests of stars on the red carpet who get directed off-camera to get out of the interview shot.

Okay, I’ve heard Kate Winslet’s story about her son’s speech advice twice in 5 minutes now. Time to put that little chestnut away…

Now I have reached critical mass with Mickey Rourke and the Loki memorial.

Diane Lane and Josh Brolin – that is some Hollywood Royalty the way it SHOULD be played. Style…mutual support…sharing the right perspective…

I’m enjoying Miley Cyrus blatantly campaigning (and sounding like she expects) to be nominated for her damn HANNAH MONTANA movie next year. Oh, country mouse…


AND THEN THE SHOW BEGINS…

Wait a minute – Is this Supporting Actress thing is like a Skull & Bones initiation ceremony? Will there be hazing involved – like paddling? Because that would be hot.

I have to think that Dustin Lance Black’s acceptance speech for Screenplay just scared the crap out of the hard core red staters. “How can we demonize that?”

The Art Direction winners stand at a little table thingy – looking like they’re at an awkward singles mixer.

Wait a second – Did they make Pattinson and Seyfried present from the “kids’ microphone”?

I’m having very happy thoughts about not having to do a post mortem on one of Ben Stiller’s award show bits at IDPR the next day. “It was funny, right? People seemed to think it was funny, don’t you think? What did your friends think? He picked the right idea. I mean, the TWILIGHT idea was funny too, but the Joaquin thing was better. Right? Okay, get him on the phone…”

Okay, if I had a lot of extra fabric for Jessica Biel’s dress, where would I put it? Uhmm..not there.

Damn, that Holocaust thing even works for short films at the Oscars.

Now we get the big “musicals are back!” number. And I have to think THIS is how middle America likes its gay!

However, does Beyonce HAVE to be the default for these things…?

After each one of these Supporting Actor “a speech from your peers” things, I expect the presenter to say, “You can go now.”

Jerry Lewis proves humanitarian mettle by giving a mercifully brief speech. Think about it – he easily could have done the buck toothed gag or the water glass in the mouth bit or launched into a few versus of his Muscular Dystrophy theme song/ So – thank you – and bring on the commercial break.

They’re rolling out the documentary nominees and people around the country are thinking, “Do I have to watch these movies – like homework or something? I mean, not one of ‘em has a wise cracking panda or adventurous French mouse or even a romantic robot…”

And, courtesy of Mr. MAN ON WIRE, we suddenly have the Cirque de Soleil.

The audience was trying to figure what the titles were for the foreign films after that confusing presentation. Then the winner’s announced and they went wha..?!

Time for the Best Song performances – Hey, is there gonna be a musical rumble here?

I swear this is like YOU GOT SERVED Indian-style!

To this day, Reese Witherspoon opens her mouth and I see and hear ‘Tracy Flick’ from ELECTION. And it scares me just a little.

Danny Boyle wins, does some ‘Tigger’ jumps for his kids and then compliments the production of the show during his moment. He’s like a goodwill juggernaut.

The Best Actress presentations…

Face Off #1: Angelina Jolie can’t help but think that she has more kids than Nicole Kidman – so she wins!

Face Off #2: Dude, I think there’s gonna be a throwdown between Sophia Loren and Meryl Streep…

It’s cool that Robert Garlock got shout outs from both Kate Winslet and Penelope Cruz tonight. He was a publicist who was a good guy. One I really only knew peripherally and yet knew very well of his reputation for old fashioned and basic decency. Because it’s rare in personal PR.

Sean Penn wins and is eloquent yet pointed. He is self aware, but he’s not going to back down from the haters.

Finally, SLUMDOG MILLIONAIRE wins it’s last award – but only because there are no more left to give out. But wasn’t that little movie supposed to go straight to DVD…? Wha.. happened?

If there is one thing I know after watching the show tonight, it is this: Meryl Streep has received 15 nominations. I know this because it was repeated so often, I thought there was a promotion somewhere, like “Tell us how many nominations Meryl Streep has received and get a free Oscar Taco or Oscar Meyer Oscar Weiner Oscar Hot Dog” or something. And in the words of Kate Winslet, “You’ll just have to suck it up, Meryl.”

At least until next year – and nomination number 16.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: